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| Singapore, January 2016 |
Dearest Paul Daniel:
I have always loved your name Kuya Paul. You have such a
beautiful, blessed name. So very much like your personality – saint-like, kind,
down-to-earth, sweet, respectful, polite, and my list could go on and on about
how good of a boy you are Kuya Paul; but mind you, you are also impatient,
self-destructive, distracted, easily persuaded, and, again, my list could go on
and on about how you need to improve in this department.
However, this birthday letter is not about who you are Kuya Paul
today – while we anticipate your 12th birthday on March 21, 2018.
My goal is to inspire you so you become the person you are
meant to be. In my 34 years as a sometimes-living/sometimes-zombie human being,
I have come to learn that life is not about the good or the bad, nor is it pure
black and white. Life is a magnificent burst of colors. It is sometimes bad, at
times better, a few times in-between, but mostly, good.
So good Kuya Paul this life that we have. This life we have
been blessed with, it can only be good. REMEMBER that Kuya Paul, when times are
difficult, when you feel like you can no longer breathe, or when you feel like
you want to end it all. At times too, when it seems like everything is going
your way, ALWAYS REMEMBER to be grateful to The One Above who has blessed you
with such a ‘good’ life.
Secondly, you are special Paul Daniel. Why would The One
Above create you, Kuya Paul? Why would He put you inside Mama’s tummy if you
weren’t? You were an ‘express’ delivery, mind you. Papa Emar and I didn’t
expect you, but still you came. That is how special you are my not-so-little
boy.
REMEMBER that, when you feel like giving up on school, on
your homework, on your Math or AP lessons, on your writing career, cartooning
dreams, or learning to tie your sports shoes. You are special and you have a
role to play in your lifetime. Whatever that is, pray. Let The One Above guide
you. I cannot impose this on you, my dear Kuya Paul.
You’ve got free will. We’ve been gifted this from The One
Above. Therefore, you always have a choice. Choose where you want to go Kuya
Paul. Choose which path you want to take. Papa Emar and I, with younger sister
Phoebe Dawn, will be with you all the way.
We might let go of your hand, in the process. That is only
because we want you to journey on your own. We do not want to influence you one
way or the other. More importantly, we don’t want to slow you down. REMEMBER
that Kuya Paul.
REMEMBER, that we will always be with you – in your
memories, in your cellphone photos (of course) and inside a portion of your big
heart. So, if you feel, right into the future, that we seemed to have left you
to fend for yourself.
No, no, no. REMEMBER, we want you to grow into the ‘person’
The One Above has planned. Besides, you can always text me, or your Papa Emar,
or Phoebe Dawn – when you feel lonely.
Finally, make room for love Kuya Paul and falling in love in
your lifetime – and everything that comes with it to include the heartbreaks,
heartaches, heart palpitations, and the indescribable feeling of needing
someone ever so badly.
Please try not to skip this part out. Well, a ‘love life’
won’t define you as a person in the long run, but it could shape the ‘human’
part in you – whether because you’ve been hurt or because you love so deeply
that every day your partner brings with her a basketful of happiness, every
morning a ray of sunshine, or every minute, she literally takes your breath
away. Don’t miss out on this.
REMEMBER to love and allow yourself to be loved. From the exterior,
you might seem to have been made only with soft parts Kuya Paul but believe me,
you are built to last, shine and leave an imprint in your lifetime. So, open up
yourself to your ‘one true love’ – when the time is ‘right’, whenever that is.
I love you Paul Daniel Vergara. I will always remain as your
number one fan no matter the circumstance, your ‘monster mom’, your
ever-reliable tutor, and your ‘one true friend’ today and the years to come.
Papa Emar, Phoebe Dawn and I love you to the moon and back,
a 100x over!
Signed With Love:
Mama Jima
